Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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