I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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