And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
