who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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