so that wasnt chicken after all
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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