i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
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we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
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Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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