is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
FUCK WHALES
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