Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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