im gay
i know
yea but for you.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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