I heard we made out
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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