38 yer olds are good kisserssss
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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