i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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