she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
