my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
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I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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