Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
