If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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