she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
