New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
