Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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