I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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