yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
