he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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