So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
