I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Randomize
