I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Randomize
