so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
