if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
