carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
