I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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