my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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