I need help removing her.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
