For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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