I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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