Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize