I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
You took a bar mat shot.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize