please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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