i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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