Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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