I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
