If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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