mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
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I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
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The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
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