he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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