No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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