i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
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