So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Randomize
