come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize