i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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