why didn't you poke me back
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
