Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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