What a fucking waste of an outfit
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize