When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I just found a bag of teeth...
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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