He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
